(excerpt from Energy Enlightenment – Do you know the way home?, page 83 )
I remember a dream I had in which I was being pursued by some rather nasty individuals. As things got more intense I called out to God and felt this wonderful warm blanket of protection wrap around me. I actually woke up feeling at peace, and in a contented state of mind. In another dream, I was again being pursued, and everywhere I hid, the pursuers found me. At the very end of the dream, I was exhausted and knew this was the end. Just as I was facing my pursuers and wondering how in the world I would get out of this one, Jesus strolled into the picture, looked at me, smiled, and said “I am how”. I literally woke up laughing because I realized I spent a lot of time running away when there was never really anything to run from. I don’t know much about dream interpretation, but I would venture a guess that my pursuers in both dreams were my fears.
To move out of fear-based emotions, I find it helpful to stay consciously connected with God as much as possible. This means I am in constant dialog while driving my car, eating dinner, watching a movie, and even while dreaming. This doesn’t mean I am in constant prayer mode. What I mean by this is that I stay aware of the presence of God in my life. It is sort of like a ticker tape running in the background. I stay aware of the presence of God whether I am taking a walk, shopping for groceries, talking with a friend, or performing any other daily activity. As an example, it is the same type of awareness I have of my heart. I may not constantly be thinking of my heart, yet I know it is inside me providing what my body needs.
(Chapter Five – Overcoming fear through Meditation, page 73 – 78)
Fear, I believe, is one of the major stumbling blocks stopping many us from exploring our spirituality. Fear of what others might think or say can weigh heavily on us. Fear of losing friends, not being accepted or fitting in are other types of fear that can prevent us from reaching our goal of becoming spiritually aware. Our over-active Ego Consciousness is terrific at instilling fear of not being good enough, smart enough or chaste enough. The list of judgments and fears can go on and on if we don’t stop it at some point.
Fear usually isn’t something we can explain away. I remember as a little girl, swimming was one of my favorite things to do. But now, as an adult, I am so afraid of the water I actually get nauseous when out on a boat. The idea of scuba diving is petrifying to me. I cannot even begin to understand why I have this fear. I know in my heart the fear is an illusion, but my Ego Consciousness makes it feel very real. Fear is an Ego Consciousness emotion. As I stated in Chapter Two, “I have come to realize my thoughts are what I am healing and Enlightening.” Don Miguel Ruiz has written a beautiful poem about waking from the “drama of fear,” and I’ve included it here.
Return to LifeI waken And nothing is the same. For the first time, I open my eyes, These eyes of mine I long believed could see And find that all I knew as true Was nothing but a false dream. Then, like a radiant star The Angel of Death The Angel of Life became And transformed my dream From a drama of fear To a joyful comedy. So surprised, I ask the Angel, “Am I dead?” She replies, “Yes, for these many years, Though your heart beat on, Your mind slept in the grave of illusion Unconscious of your divinity. “Now, with heart beating And body breathing, Your mind has wakened from hell. Renewed, your eyes Admire the beauty awaiting you. “Your divine awareness wakens All the love in your being. Hating and fearing forsaken, Gone are the guilt and the blame. Your soul forgives, Your divinity lives.” My eyes, in fascination, Stare at the Angel. Sensing the truth waking in me.
I surrender, willingly, Without condition. Humbly receiving Death and life, To hell, I release all claim And with new eyes, See my eternal love…leaving.